rear view.

unhappiness is...

.....what happens when you move the safety gate yourself, crawl behind it, and then think you are stuck.  Oh, the unhappiness!

Loyalty.

I am loyal to my alma mater.

Andy is loyal to Duke.

Baby Girl is caught in between, but based on her attire today I would say she is a Boilermaker.

So, to quote the words of her shirt today (lovingly embroidered by Auntie Mandy!)    BOILER UP!!

p.s. My main concern of the evening is not whether or not Purdue wins the game, but whether or not I can stay awake for it!!   9:57pm tip-off.....you've got to be kidding me!!

Planet MOM...

I have begun to read a book that I got when I joined my MOPS group.  It is designed to tackle the tough topic of relationships. All through life relationships change, but no single moment has changed them for me as much as becoming a mother.  I am so thankful that this book fell into my lap because it is giving me the opportunity to really analyze the relationships I have in my life, see how they have changed, and figure out how to get them back on track again (if needed!). 

I have begun to work my way through the six key relationships (self, spouse, friends, family of origin, community, and God) and thought I would share some of my thoughts on each section here.

Section one: how becoming a mom changes you.......
My, my, this is a loaded topic if I have ever seen one!  How does becoming a mom not change you?!  I have become more patient, more time conscious (or time-crazy!), more compassionate, quit my job, learned how to love on a whole different level, and began to make every single decision with Olivia in the back of my mind.  Something as simple as getting my hair cut has become a production..."no sorry I need a different appointment time because the baby nurses then", "Hi, friend, can you come watch the baby for a few hours?", "Mr. Hairdresser, will you please hurry a little lot because I need to get home to nurse my baby again."  Ahhhh, nothing in life is completely about me anymore, and that was a hard lesson to handle.  Now perhaps this is a little different since I have a baby that refuses a bottle, but I think every new mother goes through this on some level or another.  I have to be near my baby every 4 hours (it used to be 2 or 3) so she can get her daily dose of healthy breastmilk and that is stressfull!  I have to be present for bedtime because she won't go to bed without nursing.  Such a predicament I have found myself in.......however, it is worth every single moment of stress!  Being a mother is joyous, and wonderful, and heartwarming, and fun, and downright the greatest job ever!

When did I first identify myself as a mother? This happened slowly for me.  I didn't just look at Olivia and think "wow, I am totally different now".  It took a few days, but it happened for me through breastfeeding.  Realizing that another human life was dependent on me and that every single part of her being was growing and thriving because of the nourishment my body was making for her, now that is a life changing moment right there!  I officially felt like a mom.  Super-mom, actually.

Now there are certainly days where I wish I could take off my 'mom identity' and just be Stephanie, or just be Andy's wife, or just be a speech pathologist again, but those moments never stick around for too long.  The way I have made it through those moments is by not finding my entire self-identity in being a mother.  I know some women who define themselves by their children, but I seem to think that I led a pretty fulfilled life before giving birth to a baby!  Becoming a mom simply added another dimension to my identity.  Now it is one that I am proud of and one that mostly consumes my days right now, but it is not the 'end-all-be-all' to who I am as a person.  I know that not everyone sees it this way, but this is how I personally feel. 

Now the tough thing is to keep that fulfillment around for the long haul.  I see how it can become easy to wrap yourself up in being a mother so much that you forget the other important parts of your identity.  For me, this has to come through alone time and getting breaks from the baby, which are hard to get since I can only get away between nursings.  However, it is still possible in small increments.  My goal is to rely on Andy and friends/neighbors more to watch Olivia.  It may be as simple as doing the grocery shopping alone, but the point is that I have to get away.  I need that time to keep my relationship with myself strong.  I don't want to forget who I am and I happen to think that I will be a better mother by having self-identity that isn't defined by my child (or children).  My other plan is to make sure I am taking good care of myself - it seems that I am always taking care of someone else (the baby, the cat, my husband), but I need to make sure I am healthy and happy first and foremost.  I love to go for runs and now that it is getting warmer, I plan to make that part of my routine again.  Now that those plans are out there for y'all to see, I must remain committed to them!

Next up....'Who are you again? Oh yeah, the guy I married!'

let me out...

Baby Girl discovered the front door.....

...and she loves to look out.

She reaches for the bugs that fly by.....

....gives a cheesy grin when she realizes I am watching her,

and then comes crawling to get me!!!

a heavy heart...

Today my heart is sad.  It is especially sad for my sister and her sweet family.

Last year on this day we lost the tiniest member of our family.  He is missed just as much today as he was then.  Perhaps even more as we have watched his identical twin brother (Drew) and his triplet sister (Jordan) grow and thrive throughout their first year. 

We know he is rejoicing in heaven with Jesus, but that doesn't always make the sadness in our hearts go away.

In memory of Brady Thomas.

1 lb. 11oz, 13.5 inches

March 6 - March 19, 2009

Traveling girls - the final chapter.

Finally, I sit here to post the final batch of pictures from our trip to Oklahoma.  I know my mother is waiting on them, so I will go ahead and put some of them here for y'all to see, too!  (even though our trip was 3 weeks ago!)  One would think that I would have all kinds of time on my hands since I stay home with Olivia, but that doesn't seem to be the case.  Most every day we have an outing of some sort, whether it is a play date, lunch date, or simply errands like grocery shopping.  Combine that with a nap schedule, shower time for mommy, making dinner, and some QT with the husband, and my 'to do' list often gets put on the back burner, which explains the delay.  Hmmm, it appears that I have successfully digressed again, something I am very good at (but not nearly as skilled as my husband;), so without further ado, here is a photographic tour of the remainder of our trip.....

With so many mouths to feed, a lot of our time was spent in the kitchen!

Cathy and sweetie pie Eli, who is fabulous with all of the babies!

We also spent a lot of time just playing around, which in my mind was the best part!  Moments like that make me really wish we all lived closer because there is nothing better than time at home with your family.

We did go on a few shopping trips and it was a production getting all four kiddos ready at the same time!  However, big brother Eli was a pro at helping to keep Drew & Jordan happy in their car seats (they aren't big fans!) 

Eventually, Papa arrived which made us all very happy!!  He and Nana got put on baby-duty a lot, but I don't think they minded one bit =)

Then Olivia and I flew home to Charleston so I could help host a baby shower that weekend for a dear friend.  We missed Drew and Jordan's baptism and birthday party, but the week we spent together was perfect just as it was!

The end.  (finally)

Eighth month recap...

Today Olivia Grace turns nine months old!  Wow!  That happened fast.  Well, on some days I can hardly remember our old life and motherhood is so consuming I feel like I have been a mother forever, but that is a post for a different day.  She doesn't know it, but her special day falls on 'Selection Sunday'.  What a lucky little lady ;)

Weight: 19 lbs according to a doctor visit 2 weeks ago.  She has lost nearly a pound.
Height: not a clue and she is napping and I don't feel like waiting till she wakes up to measure her

showing off her yoga pose

Napping: She has officially dropped the third nap of the day and naps in the morning and the afternoon for an average of an hour an half.  Her naps have increased in length, which I am happy about because she is such a happier baby when she gets enough sleep! She goes down sleepy yet still awake after some snuggling from mommy.  Sometimes (like this morning!) she crawls around her crib and plays for up to 15 minutes before laying down to go to sleep. 

the 'put open mouth on floor' trick learned from her cousin Drew!

Night: Do I even want to talk about this?!  Bedtime has moved up to 6:45-7ish due to dropping that third catnap and she wakes up ready for the day around 7:30 am.  That in itself is a good deal; however, she is waking up anywhere from one to three times a night!  It is frustrating, to say the least.  I need to get serious about sleep training again, but have been making excuses  (e.g., traveling, teething, etc.)  Perhaps her ninth month will be the time...

showing off her baby blues

Food:  She loves all fruits and grains (i.e., oatmeal and barley cereal), likes avocado, butternut squash, carrots and sweet potatoes, tolerates peas, and gags/chokes on green beans, meats, and pretty much anything else we offer. She likes to eat Gerber puffs, Cheerios (the adorable face has passed;), and bits of cracker and is quite good at feeding herself.

Spring has sprung and her Easter basket has arrived

Nursing: Breastfed every four hours during the day for anywhere from 10-20 minutes total. Eats solids three times a day and drinks water from her sippy cup.

Skills: She began crawling just about a week ago and has even mastered the wood floors (that were too slippery to begin with).  Explores all of the rooms of the house and gets into just about everything!  Has begun to pull herself to her knees in her crib and while playing.  Feeds self more efficiently now and can pick up small items with the pincher grasp rather than using her whole hand.  Claps to show excitement and along with some songs.  Raises her arms up in the air when we say "yay!" and raise our arms.  "Dances" by sitting and bouncing her body and head along with music (and just radomly when she is in a good mood).  Laughs at the puppets on her Baby Einstein videos and whenever there is another baby on TV.

Language: Expressive - added several consonants to her repertoire this month including /m, p, n, k, t/, increased 'dada' to 'daddy',  just began to say 'mmm' and 'ma', but I am still waiting for the coveted 'mama'!,  continues to squeal and shriek to show delight and to simply enertain herself.   Receptive - will look towards Andy when we say 'where is daddy?', says 'ka' when we point and say 'cat',  No independent gesturing/signing noted yet, but all household objects, animals, and social words are continually modeled with the appropriate sign.

Fun Facts: her first two teeth broke through this month (the bottom middle), has a slight complete obsession with balls and books, still puts everything in her mouth!, shows her frustration and anger by saying 'mmmmm', clenching her fists, and turning red, continues to blow raspberries with her lips, does not wave hello or goodbye as frequently anymore, loves to have books read to her and turns the pages for you, pulls off her socks and shoes almost everytime we are in the car, had her first ear infection this month, likes to go on walks and be outside, is very active and vocal at Gymboree class each week, buries her head into your shoulder when sleepy, has begun to sleep on her belly most all of the time now, startles very easily, plays around happily in her crib after naps and in the morning until someone gets her, likes any and all dogs, remains very schedule oriented and lets us know when it is time for her to eat or nap!

intently keeping her eye on the prize!

Traveling girls - Part 2

After looking through the pictures, I have decided that several posts will be required to cover the remainder of our trip.  I want to be able to document as much as possible (especially the pictures and videos) because we had such a great time, so look for multiple posts in the coming week.....

Our weekend in Dallas came to an end and the three of us (Mandy, Olivia, and I) made the drive to Oklahoma.  Mandy and I were able to catch up on life while Baby Girl snoozed in the backseat.  The girl-talk was just like old times (minus the baby in the backseat!) and I savored every minute of it!  When we arrived at my sister's house, it was baby-baby-baby from that point forward......

Drew shows Olivia how to lick the kitchen floor!  I think Olivia was paying attention because she has now become obsessed with putting her open mouth on the granite that surrounds our fireplace!  And so begins the long list of things they will teach one another...

Mandy gets put on diaper duty....no one is safe with three babies and one toddler on the loose!

Mommy, why does Jordan keep touching my face (and sticking her fingers in my mouth!)?! 

Sometimes we had to trap the babies for a bit so we could get some things accomplished!  However, I don't think they minded because they got to watch some Baby Einstein, which they all three love!  Can you guess the baby order?  (left to right - D, O, J)

Olivia loves books and will let anyone who is interested read her a story.  Notice how she has her feet crossed at the ankles?  She has done that since she was a newborn and it makes me smile everytime I see it! 

BATH TIME!  Each night when Drew and Jordan would hear the bath water start, they would crawl as fast as they could into the bathroom.  It was adorable!  Olivia couldn't crawl just yet, but she showed her enthusiasm just the same by lining up with her cousins to anxiously await her nightly bath.

It was crowded with four kiddos in the tub, but none of them seemed to mind.  Olivia handled it like a champ and acted as if being surrounded by multiple other children at all times was nothing new!  I have a sneaking suspicion she got my social gene ;)

Bath with cousins from Stephanie Allen on Vimeo.

Drew, your smile is too cute to not post!!  We miss all of you so much already...

what a difference a week makes...

Just last week this was a common sight.....


Attempting to crawl part 1 from Stephanie Allen on Vimeo.


However, progress has been made and now she can do THIS....


Olivia's first day of crawling from Stephanie Allen on Vimeo.

random, but fun!

Baby Girl once again moved out of view of the monitor and then went silent at naptime, so I snuck in and checked on her.  This is what I found.....she had fallen asleep sitting up!  Good thing her bumpers are so soft!

Yesterday, she needed to have some relaxation time so she got an ice cube in her mesh feeder, Baby Einstein on the big screen, and time to hang  out in her rocking chair (on loan from the Liegl's). I love how chill she looks.

And, you all know how much fun it is to suck on your toes, right?  If not, Baby Girl demonstrates it here for you....

Traveling girls - Part 1

Olivia and I traveled to Oklahoma last week via Dallas.  We got to spend the weekend with my dear friend Mandy and then traveled on up to Oklahoma City to celebrate birthday week with the Meyer family.   Olivia was an absolute trooper on all the flights and made friends with anyone who would look her way!  I really couln't ask for a more easy going baby when it comes to traveling.

Mandy and Jared were lovely hosts and Olivia LOVED their dog Libby, who provided hours of easy baby enertainment.  (i.e., simply have the dog in the room and Olivia would sit and stare at her completely enthralled, as exhibited to the right)

Olivia even had a playdate with cutie-pie Brody (son of Mandy's friend) while in Dallas!  They got along marvelously and would be friends for sure if they lived closer.  In fact, Brody loved Olivia so much he kept giving her hugs and laying his head on her shoulder!  Precious!  He was even willing to share his coveted blue car, which Olivia loved.  Drooling in excess also became a part of our life while traveling, as displayed on her pink shirt. ick.  Perhaps some teeth on on their way?